Post by Magicheart on Nov 25, 2010 16:53:52 GMT -5
Against the wishes of Windclan's medicine cats, Pantherfang had limped out toward the Moonpool stream. He had needed to stretch his limbs, he was going stir crazy in camp and couldn't stand other cats fussing over him. He gazed at the large bandage covering the wound that stretched down his flank and sighed. He was growing older and wasn't healing as quickly from injury as he used to.
The senior warrior had never felt so conflicted in his entire life. He glanced towards the hill that led up to the moon pool and the stars beyond, hidden now by the light of the sun. Were his mate and daughter watching him there, even now? His heart ached for the loss of Rainfeather and Sparrowpaw, and yet, he knew that he had some feelings for Sunstar that were different from any he had felt before, as angry and in denial as he was about them. He sighed and felt the bandages tighten around his waist.
Before, when Rainfeather and Sparrowpaw were alive, he had begun to fear death for the thought of leaving them. Now, he wasn't so sure. Leaving his clan and his son, Eclipsedstar, leader of Shadowclan, would be difficult without having defeated Lostclan but...
See his brother Twilight? Being reunited with his mate and daughter? These longings created a feeling of peace within him when thinking of death that he did not understand.
...and then there was Sunstar...
Seeing her so burdened with responsibility of becoming the new leader of Windclan and agonizing over the same feelings and losses he felt in his own heart....it was nearly unbearable for him to see....and to think about leaving.
"Are you watching over me, even now?" he whispered to the stars. "Guide me....for I am lost and weary."
The large black warrior hung his head.
The senior warrior had never felt so conflicted in his entire life. He glanced towards the hill that led up to the moon pool and the stars beyond, hidden now by the light of the sun. Were his mate and daughter watching him there, even now? His heart ached for the loss of Rainfeather and Sparrowpaw, and yet, he knew that he had some feelings for Sunstar that were different from any he had felt before, as angry and in denial as he was about them. He sighed and felt the bandages tighten around his waist.
Before, when Rainfeather and Sparrowpaw were alive, he had begun to fear death for the thought of leaving them. Now, he wasn't so sure. Leaving his clan and his son, Eclipsedstar, leader of Shadowclan, would be difficult without having defeated Lostclan but...
See his brother Twilight? Being reunited with his mate and daughter? These longings created a feeling of peace within him when thinking of death that he did not understand.
...and then there was Sunstar...
Seeing her so burdened with responsibility of becoming the new leader of Windclan and agonizing over the same feelings and losses he felt in his own heart....it was nearly unbearable for him to see....and to think about leaving.
"Are you watching over me, even now?" he whispered to the stars. "Guide me....for I am lost and weary."
The large black warrior hung his head.
